Online Dating Profiles: Reading Between the Lines
Reading through an
online dating profile to try to figure out if someone is compatible with you may seem easy, but after going through a few of them, you may realize that things aren’t always as they seem. There simply can't be that many men out there who are interested in "long walks in the moonlight and cuddling," or women who "enjoy independence."
There's a fine line between honesty and 'dressing to impress' in an
online dating profile, and it's hard to figure out what some people mean. In order to help you navigate the dangerous waters ahead, we’ll let you in on the real meaning of a few common terms you’re likely to come across in your
online dating adventures.
An online dating profile’s concept of perfection: What it means
The most common area where
online dating profiles use a bit of descriptive license is in the section where they describe a "perfect date" or what they think would constitute an "ideal evening." In their
online dating profiles, most women will put down something romantic like a candlelit dinner followed by dancing. Translated, this means a woman wants to know the man is willing to spend a few bucks to court her. Most men who use their
online dating profile to describe the perfect experience will mention cuddling in front of the fireplace or taking a long walk, holding hands. This sounds romantic, too, but means the opposite of the woman's message - it gives a subtle warning that he is looking for a woman who won't demand a cash-heavy investment should the relationship develop past
online dating.
Reading online dating profiles to uncover motives
Let's move on to those descriptions of what you're looking for in a companion’s
online dating profile. If her
online dating profile says she is looking for someone who really listens and isn't judgmental? Translation: You shouldn't be easily shocked by the occasional confession of past adventures that are a bit beyond the range of normal. He's using his
online dating profile to attract women that are adventurous and willing to try new things? You'd better go to the library and check out the Kama Sutra (hint: it's not a Korean Cookbook).
Does an online dating profile open with a bang or a cry for help?
Perhaps the greatest red flag you should watch out for are the
online dating profiles that begin, "No head games, please... " Really? You mean there are people out there that are actively seeking head games? If the
online dating profile begins with a request not to get nailed to the proverbial wall, or begins with something along the vein of "Tired of being hurt..." stay clear - this is a wounded animal. Wounded animals lash out at even the most well-meaning, kind-hearted souls when they get too close. Don't let yourself be sacrificed to the
online dating gods for someone else’s crimes.
Online dating profiles: What to look for
If you want to find someone with real potential, look for someone who starts his or her
online dating profile with an upbeat opening sentence, not a warning. If they are, "Looking for someone to relax with in the evenings," or "Hoping to teach you how to sail," they are leaving it open-ended enough to be comfortable. Could be friendship, could be more. This is a good start. If the
online dating profile displays a quirky sense of humor ("Short, near-sighted, unemployed, male with large legal debt looking for wealthy super-model) that appeals to you, go for it. This is a personal preference, so what you may love, another person may hate, but if you immediately "get" the person's humor, you have a better than average chance of hitting it off. Humor is difficult to translate in an
online dating arena, so if you understand it via the Internet, you two have already made a connection.
Perfect online dating profiles? Be concerned.
Finally, if the
online dating profile reads like something out of either People magazine or the Wall Street Journal, have serious doubts. Look for discrepancies and double-check their facts when corresponding. It's so easy to fudge the facts in
online dating profiles that many people give in to the temptation to "dress up" their profiles just a bit. Keep this in mind at all times, then have fun!